Forgive me.

Forgive me because I caused you harm. My tongue whipping slashes your throat causing excrutiating pain on your tortoise shell. Your pride bashes my weak and fragile heart. Forgive me for not giving you the respect you deserve. You took me in when I was on my last thread of life. Forgive me for taking advantage of your kindness. You are generous to a fault. Forgive for not telling you the truth about myself. You always listened when I needed you. Forgive me for all the rotten things I've said to you. Forgive me for wanting to leave you.

Hairdesigner or Hairjanitor?

I'm fed up. I don't know where to go from here. It's easy to say," The only way is up." But honestly, it feels like spiralling stairs going down. I've work my butt off for 4 years. I've been ripping foils,mixing colors,shampooing,sweeping,washing bowls and dishes,windexing surfaces,laundry,cleaning bathrooms,toilets,vacuuming,wiping fans,mirrors,answering phone,scrubbing sinks and walls. The lists can go on. But for $9.75/hr + tips I can retire with a sense of accomplishment. "Get me up on a cross. I need the wood." This is soooo Friekin Ridiculous! I come in to work with back and forth back handed digs on each others appearance. How did I get myself here? I paid $7500 so I can be a Hairjanitor. I know I have to pay my dues before I can reach "The Floor" status. But I look around me and think that noone has work this hard to get to where they are now for this long period of time. Its time to move on. I know I'm better than this. While in hair school, I dreamnt of high fashion hair, stage work,editorial, and travelling. Maybe I'm not that great yet,but I'm determined to get there. I don't know about this environment I'm in but somethings got to give. I'm a Hairdesigner not a Hairjanitor.